In those days I was not doing anything in my life except sitting at home and doing nothing. I remember, I used to wake up in the morning and first thing I used to do was, I used to pick up a place in my house and sit there for the rest of the day, doing nothing, staring randomly and breathing abruptly. I would occasionally move but just for very essential human needs, very natural biological acts. It was a kind of very personal experiment which I was trying to do where I would just sit and observe the vibes and the flow of the world around. I would sit and hear a lot of distant noises and voices. It was never a contemplative or a meditative thing, it was just an attempt to become the wisp of the undifferentiated nothingness. I wanted to know what would happen if I stop doing any action, as they say every action has an equal and opposite reaction, I wanted to prove them wrong, I wanted to see what nothingness could do and what I could do with nothingness. I was living alone and I had not a single person who would disturb me while I was doing my very-personal experiment thing.
It took me a little while to get into the whole thing. For first few days I kept on thinking about all those things which a normal person would think but later I became the master, as if I found out how to deactivate the part of my brain which had thoughts and regrets and cravings and remorse and anger and happiness and depression and fear and libido and other trivial mundane things. After few days it became very simple for me, I would sit blankly for hours and hours with a blank stare and a blank face and blank gaze. After some days there was no hunger and thirst and then there was no sleep. I was not even getting weak, in fact I was getting stronger and healthier day by day. I didn’t know how it was happening but nothingness made me very healthy. The hair on my body stopped growing and the growth of my nails also stopped. I had no idea what I was doing or actually not doing but I kept on doing it for seventy three days. On the seventy forth day, I stopped doing it.
That was the day I felt I was the one…the one who was chosen for the task..the task of…ending the world.
That day, from the very first blink of my eye, I could sense the fear around me. Everything around, every single organism.. kind of started asking for mercy. I didn’t want to do anything but everything around me was asking for it. I was chosen for the task, they all knew it.
I went to the washroom and I saw six rats, drowned in my toilet and they all looked happy. They committed suicide.
A lot of birds started crashing themselves on my glass windows. They all lost their sight, they all got blinded and they wanted to come to me and finish themselves, they also wanted to commit suicide.
I could hear the whole world crying, dogs, animals, birds.
I could hear the crumbling of all the buildings.
I could hear the noise of thunder.
It took a while but later everything stopped making sound and I went out.